To make up for my absence...

Do you think the narrator could be gay? I get so focused on all the information about honey badgers I can't tell.

Hello spring

It was such an incredible day today that I took off my scarf and jacket. Even now I can hear the snow coming off the roof and all the little drops sound like individual screams of dying. The warmth this is causing to flood through my heart has no comparison. Okay, maybe that time I watched an extremely intrusive, ill mannered, small person who was screaming and touching everyones food trip on the cobblestones and whack it's foul little head. Maybe.

I know today's perfect weather is suspicious and likely luring us into false sense of security but it's just enough that I feel like I can finally take the gun out of my mouth.

words to live by

Life lessons to remember

Detectives do not offer back high fives when eaves dropping gets a positive reinforcer.

Detectives get the information from you, not the other way around. Not even when you ask nicely.

Complimenting detectives on their ability to remain unbiased isn't necessary and makes them suspicious. Following it with "and I mean that" doesn't make them any less suspicious.