So this might be a little more full of bitching than usual. Not sure yet, but I can see that it's mighty possible.
Today was one of those days where... well, you know how there are things you could hate about certain people if it bothered you enough, but it doesn't because that's your buddy and nothing they do bothers you that much? Okay, now you know the people who you wish it didn't bother you but it does and no matter how hard you try to not let it, it bores into your very soul and sucks the fucking life out of you? You know what? For the sake of conversation, let's call them "family".
At some point super awesome mingled with super annoying and then (probably because they had been drinking and found life a little boring as of late) decided to throw caution to the wind, went home soused and fucked bareback. Whatever they spawned dropped by the pearl today. I woke up feeling so snuggly and warm. No work + snowstorm usually = me putting on PJ's and kicking about for a bit humming and sipping coffee. This morning it equaled my door kicked in with the AH talking about driving about in the storm because "it's so beautiful and no one is out yet", attached it to a cup of coffee and I bought it hook line and sinker. It was totally worth it. And I do mean 100% absolutely fantastic. I even took some pictures of the beach:
Then it was time to get real and grab a shovel, and since we had goofed off for so long, and since it has started some weird rain/sleet deal while we were gone the snow that had collected in our absence was super heavy. I didn't care though, I was still all euphoric from making yoga my bitch the night before and just charged it. I was gearing up when no shit, she turns to me and says "you know, the neighbors are always so nice to us and I see them shoveling and I keep thinking I should go help them". My response was way to automatic and kicked the day off with "Yeah? Do ya? Is that what you think you should do?" because in MY head I can't picture talking about helping someone across the street shovel when the person you are addressing is about to handle what you left lie all day and you helping across the street actually robs the person helping you of a fucking shovel. Is it me? Is this me? I'm willing to admit when I am out of it. I really am. Go ahead, try me. Unless you're just being a dick and then that's pretty funny and I would totally do it to you.
It was random shit like this that happened all day that got my hate rocking. And I don't want to hate, I want to emanate sweetness and light. It just feels right. I went out to shovel again (I went out frequently since it was like shoveling water I didn't want it to get to build up to much and get to heavy). After I completed the front and the back and come in all sweaty and happy, she looks at me and
Me: I really love Mumford & Sons! I was dancing out there. You should seriously check them out.
Her: Um. Don't you want to shovel in front of the mailbox?
Me: No. No I don't. But you go right ahead any time you're ready okay?
Don't you want to shovel in front of the mailbox? No hey, thanks or best daughter ever! No no, more of a question of if I want to shovel the 900 pounds of snow in front of the fucking mailbox where the plows will continue to put it all night long. And I hate this shit because then I'm feeling all weird inside like I'm fishing for compliments just by making eye contact. Like I want a gold fucking star or something when really I just know that the snow isn't going to shovel itself and it's going to help the entire unit and I do it for myself as much as anyone else. The question wandered me into some bizarre boo I'm under-appreciated land even though I nuked that fucking place forever ago when I found it was full of these strange reptilian creatures who cry all the time and ask for change. What an awkward worms under the skin feeling you know? I bet martyrs feel it constantly but pass it off as how they are supposed to feel because they have psychobabbled themselves into thinking they are doing it for everyone else and that's what true altruism feels like. I mean it's not like they have martyr meetups where they share their experiences, how they felt over the last week and what they did to avoid drin... never mind.
There was more stupidity about dogs joining me out front and why can't I watch them while I shovel and plow trucks blast by the house and that was handled by me saying anyone else who wanted to do that was more than free or please piss off yeah? It was cool though because by the time I was almost to the point of burning the place to the ground the snow chilled out and more driving ensued.
omg woe is me huh?
There's this road between Kingston and Duxbury that is awesome all the time. In the spring and summer you are funneled through green and promises of a fairyland that ends by shooting you under this obscenely narrow bridge that snaps you back into reality but in a really neat risk taking kind of way that puts a cape on you if you're moving fast enough. In the fall it's on fire. You're driving through fire. Winter is always darker and more ominous but sometimes the branches sticking into the sky are sharpened enough that I can't believe I don't have a picture (or hundreds) of it. Once under the bridge you get the Jones River and eventually the ocean and it all happens perfectly but that one strip has always been a personal favorite. These pictures don't do it justice at all.
When we first approached it today I quite literally gasped with the beauty. Every single branch down to the tiniest one was decorated with a snowy sleeve and the contrast against the dark of the trunks and grey sky was thrilling.
Also, hello? I just met my newest love Mumford & Sons. With these guys pouring their magic into my ears, nothing in the world can keep me down. Not even the snow. This is the blackest of black magic.
Just in case you didn't know:
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