Believing the hype...

Yesterday was awesome. I finally went to the beach. It was way to hot for the boys so they were trapped indoors where it would remain a nice cool controlled temperature. The beach ruled. Not only did I overcome my totally irrational fear of swimming in the ocean (the little someone wriggling under my foot made it more of a challenge) but I got some color as well. I flat out burned. I am now a nice shade of pink. I am used to living in New England where it takes about 5 consecutive hours in the sun to get any type color on this washed out skin wasteland, but apparently, around these here parts it only takes a little over a couple hours to cook yourself into a blistered mess. Awesome. I allowed myself some flesh rest today but tomorrow I will be back at the ultimate tanning experience. I might even get a new bathing suit to finish the process. The cool part about here is that you can totally remove any tan lines in an hour. They just go away and new ones are made. Interesting. It makes me want to move here and spend one hour per day getting strange shapes on me just to change them all the next day. Anyway, the beach was all I wanted it to be as the water is under 50 degrees and is totally beautiful and clear. I posted some pictures on my flickr account for you. I believe you can go into my sets and see each set for each picture taking experience rather than going through them all one by one. Totally up to you, I just personally like options.

Another thing I did yesterday was visit South Beach. After hearing how incredible it is, I thought I would give it a shot. I want to say that believing the hype (something I am usually against to the fullest of my capacity) has once again proved to be not worth it in the slightest (further reinforcement that I should not believe hype!). It reminds me that people also find things like Disney World and 6 Flags exciting. Don't get me wrong, it was pretty. Overly so. It was so pretty it was kind of surreal. Everything is fake. The people, the lifestyle, the shops... everything. I have never felt so out of place in my life. Had I self esteem issues I wouldn't even be blogging right now, I would be at the gym. I might never leave. Do they have life time memberships? I bet they do around South Beach. I also would have scheduled my hair, nail and plastic surgery appointments. My hair is all wrong, all my nails need help and my boobs are like 300 times to small. I could also stretch my face back a little I bet. Hmm... Luckily I do not have self esteem issues and instead of feeling less than I simply felt totally lost in a false representaion of what is supposedly a rocking good time. A rocking gay good time. Needless to say I probably won't be frequenting SoBe or even going back for any length of time unless I happen to be cutting through and run out of gas.

It has come to my attention there is an unknown aficionado on the sly. I'm not the type that revels in secrets so this irks me slightly, however I am all about having fans so I rather hope this activity continues. Isn't that conflicting? The fact that my last name was used narrows the search considerably. I admit, I'm curious to the max. I am also psyched this blog is being read. I mean, imagine having a blog that was never even looked at except for by you? I guess that would be a diary of sorts now wouldn't it? Blech. Then you have to worry about people peeking and it gets all stressful and tense. I'm keeping mine open to the public. Horray for you!

Today reaped many many rewards. I have told you how not dog friendly this place is right? Well, it's not. That's not totally true. If your dog is under 20#, you are Latin, carry it in your purse and refer to it as "my baby", they are allowed anywhere. Seriously. Since both my dogs are clearly more than 20#, I am not Latin and I refuse to call them my babies, we have to find other options of them running amok. One of the choices is the beach. At night. We skulk about the beach after hours and hope Charlie's barking doesn't get us thrown off (so far so good) and also that we don't lose James (commence using blinky lights!). There is also the super cloudy/rainy times when all parks are pretty much empty. Then we own this place. I also told you about the dog park mission that failed so badly the other day. But I am not easily dissuaded. F that. I kept on keeping on and decided today was the day to chance driving into the ghetto and try out the Amelia Earhart Park which had a promised 5 acre dog park in it. SUCCESS!!! That's right! Not only did we find said park but we also never felt threatened during the ride into the higest crime area in Florida! Nice!! Not only was it not even *half* as bad as everyone acted like it would be, but the park was huge, lush and beautiful! 5 acres for the dogs to run about and act silly on. This is the part that got me since the dogs weren't even considering running about for long periods of time as it is hot as hell here. But the open space and freedom was worth every second. Pictures of this tropical doggy paradise are in fact posted on Flickr and I am so happy I finally found a place that was cordial towards canines. Oh yeah, and that actually existed.

You know all the things I spoke of doing? I don't want to do them anymore. If I want to see monkeys in a cage I'll simply peer into one of the many pointless shops on South Beach. I have seen a plethra of orchids. Bonsai trees are rad but I have seen them as well. The problem with all of these places is that they are far away and I have to ditch the boys to accomplish them. I really have no intrest in dumping the boys just to see things I have seen before. Also, I love the morning. Especially the early morning. Trouble is, I am never up tp enjoy it! So once I rouse myself from slumber it's getting to late to drive about and get sucked into the vast expensive nothingness of tourism. Doesn't sound so bad when it's worded that way eh? The interesting part of this is that I am usually totally happy just walking about in the great outdoors looking around and enjoying the bountiful eye pleasure nature permits here. This place is one massive botanical garden. Tomorrow I am going to pack it up and head to the Keys. I have wanted to see them and I can bring the boys. Heaven. We will not hunt the tiny key deer and we will not exit the vehicle while on alligator alley. We will however, take pictures. I might even stay for the breathtaking sunset everyone raves about. Hopefully this isn't one of those hype things.

Oh, I have made a route to follow on my search for joy. I'll tell you all about it sometime soon. I am going to get my teeth fixed as well as they are starting to break. I'll tell you all about that too.