If you can't say anything smart, don't say anything at all.

I have a whole slew of things that make my brain go nut-so (pet peeves so to speak) but two keep cropping up recently and I do believe this is the place to unload the resentment.

When a white person discriminates a black person, it's called? Correct. Racism. When a black person discriminates a white person, it's called? Come on, you can do it. RACISM. Oh my FUCK, what is this "reverse racism" bullshit??? Reverse racism would be the opposite of racism. Due to the reversal aspect of it all. Here... Webster is going to give us a hand:

rac⋅ism   [rey-siz-uhm]

noun

1. a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.

2. a policy, system of government, etc., based upon or fostering such a doctrine; discrimination.

3. hatred or intolerance of another race or other races.

Okay, here's where it gets tricky. For morons. Focus should be on the word opposite...

re⋅verse   [ri-vurs]

adjective, noun, verb

1. opposite or contrary in position, direction, order, or character: an impression reverse to what was intended; in reverse sequence.
2. acting in a manner opposite or contrary to that which is usual, as an appliance or apparatus.

So "reverse racism" would mean everyone was getting along, regardless of creed and color. Two negatives equal a positive and all that? Can I get a hell yeah? Now, can I get a reverse hell yeah?

The second bothersome issue comes up at work quite often. Clients constantly say, "The total is what? That's not the amount the estimate said!" I'm not even taking Webster up on this one...

First off, the estimate never actually said anything, but as this is a mistake I am sometimes prone to, I'm going to leave it alone. Secondly, hello? Those two sentences combined make me want to start slapping. Trouble is, I know once I start, I won't be able to stop. An estimate is an approximate, not an absolute. It's to help you get an idea of what the final price will be. The total is the absolute accrued amount tallied up once all work has been completed. To think for one second, the estimate is going to be the exact same as the end total, is ridiculous.

The prophet continues to remind me I am stuck here on Planet Moron and there is nothing I can do about it so I might as well get used to it. Were it not for this sage advice, make no mistake, I would be under heavy surveillance due to my "unpredictable" violent outbursts.

Well, I certainly feel better.