Who's bad as using their "inside voice"?

I have been working up the street a ways at Jordan Furniture installing all their graphics for the Enchanted Village. I was kept on a pretty short leash today as a lot of the "higher ups" came in to scrutinize all the work that is being done. In fact, Eliot the pony tail wearing hippy looking owner dude of Jordan Furniture showed up to see the enchanted going ons.



At the risk of being redundant and lame, he seemed completely enchanted by everything. He also looked me straight in the eye and asked me how my day was going. I answered a bit to cheerily or loudly or something because everyone gave me "the look" (I get that a ton when they "higher up professionals" are observing our work) and he seemed slightly creeped out but he mustered up a smile and moved on. Whatever man, I'm having a FANTASTIC day making your shit look it's best. Why should I hide my extreme pleasure from some pseudo famous guy with a pony tail? Never mind the fact that in the end I seriously doubt he gives a shit what I say. He's a multi millionaire, I'm the graphics girl. Seriously. They also filmed Chronicle today so I got "the look" and shushed a lot while that happened. At one point in the beginning (when in my defense I had no clue anything was being filmed) I was turning "I'm blind! How can I work when I am blind?" into a cute little repetitive song because they had turned all the lights out J (my boss) came running over as fast as he could to stop me. Then I ended up questioning what Chronicle meant, and then asking if it was that show that is like 60 minutes but no one watches it? Everyone heard. Even the people from Chronicle. Because apparently they were on the other side of the half wall I was working on. It happens. But, over all I think it went swimmingly because all the big wigs kept going on and on about what great work we do and how terrific everything looks. J just kept me moving because he knows compliments and conversation gets me all excited and unpredictable. I can't be trusted. He knows this because I worked for him years ago for about a two year spell. However, he kept asking me to do things and I kept telling him I don't know how. I'm not pulling a fast one, I legitimately don't know how. So at the end of the day he's all, you worked for me for two years! How do you not know how to install?! And, You worked for me for TWO YEARS! How do you not know how to run the machinery to cut vinyl?! It's kind of funny. Those two years were me doing practically nothing. I got paid to dance about and drink coffee for the most part. When I went on installs and asked what I should do, they'd tell me not to worry about it and that they could handle it. When I asked to learn the machinery, they told me they were to busy or that they'd do it for me. Never one to ignore the full potential of a situation, I never pushed for any of it and enjoyed getting paid to do the easiest of jobs. Now I am just a stand in until I move back to AZ so as much as I want to take the job seriously, I cannot. Let's face it, work is now the most relaxing fun I have so I am going to live it up. It never matters in the long run because everyone ends up thinking I am a scream or white trash. Either one totally works for me, especially when I am dead sure I am never seeing any of those yahoos again. Also, if the end of the world comes I'm pretty sure I can hunt and cook my own food. They'll just be good at talking down to people and looking down their noses while scowling. Cook food on a scowl bitches.

While waiting for J the other morning because he was super late, I thought I would take a stroll though Home Depot for kicks. It was the best and the worst all in one. The best is that I finally had the time and memory to pick up the last pieces needed for the butterfly mobile!! Yeah! I am now going to lay this fucker out and get to building as soon as I have the time and patience. The worst started back at the house when the plug on the vacuum lost a prong in the wall. Now it needs a new plug. Since no one in my house knows how to take the first step, all these small projects land on me. I have no idea how to change a plug and the last time I tampered with electricity I blew out half the house and the electrician looked so stricken that I am extremely hesitant to try electricity as a hobby again. There I was in the isle that is loaded down with 5 billion plug heads and when I flagged down an employee he refused to help me because the "electrician won't be in for three weeks". I asked him to find someone who had done this type of thing before because I just needed to get it done. Please. There has to be someone? Please. Then I promptly freaked the fuck out. Big time. Picture insults, swearing, crying. Yup, chalk that store up as yet one more place I will not be going back to. I'm not sure what happens at those points, but wow do I feel refreshed afterwards... The aftermath of this shitshow is that my brother stopped by, blew us all away, and changed the plug. Miracles never cease.

5 days out of my week are spent in gridlock traffic. Twice every day I see helicopters reporting the traffic "news". Twice a day I hear the weather reported. I want to start my very own radio station. I would not own helicopters. I would not have a weather casting team. The traffic would go something like this: Okay folks here's traffic! It's a weekday at 5 o'clock! Do the math! The weather would be equally well thought out: All right then everyone! Time to open the closest window or go outside quick like! Is it cloudy? Could rain then don't you think?